Jen's Crash Course On Making Yourself a Priority

Many of us do it. We work tirelessly to serve others, to make others happy… to strive for perfection. As most of us well know, perfection is not something we can pull off without a hitch. We’ll plow through illnesses, put aside our own needs and wants and essentially bend over backward to please the people in our lives, whether it is our family, friends, coworkers or employers. On the outside, people like us seem to have it all together. However, attempting to juggle all this perfection most often puts something very vital at risk: our own well-being.

Considering that this is my first post of the New Year, I thought I’d share one of my resolutions. I’m not one to usually make resolutions, as a rule. I find the concept odd considering the idea of change should be something one is willing to accept at any point, not just once a year. However, recently, I have had some very good friends who have quite considerately pointed out that I’m not very good about taking care of myself. So, I thought I’d try something new. First, I’d try making a few New Year’s Resolutions. I’d make both physical and internal resolutions. One of those resolutions would be to make myself a priority in my own life.

So what does all that mean? For me, this means that I stop constantly putting everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. That I start making my own health and happiness a priority. This will include my time in the mornings (which I have already been doing for the past 10 days or so) for my workouts, that I will not feel bad about saying “no” for something that I have not committed myself to doing and that I do not have time to squeeze in (consider yourselves warned) and that I will not punish myself if perfection is not attained. I will realize my humanity and that I make mistakes… like all other humans. And it’s all OK.

Most of you who know me probably have doubts that I can do these things. I am happy to report that I’m off to a good start. I received a good number of gift cards for Christmas, and instead of spending them on something “sensible” (as I normally would do), I spent them on things I actually wanted (not needed) and on myself (not on my husband or my stepdaughter). That doesn’t seem like much, but it is a huge leap for me. I have made a promise to myself to take better care of my health so that I will not spend 2010 as ill as I was in 2009. And I have also promised myself that I’d spend more time with my friends, who are more of a remedy to my troubled soul as any prescribed anti-depressant, than I did in 2009.

Making the decision to try to mend your Type A personality is never an easy choice. Essentially, this is one of the choices I made as a “New Year’s Resolution”. Hopefully, I can stick to it longer than most people stick to their own resolutions. Time will tell, but I have great hope. It is so important to not be self-centered and self-important, but on the other end of that spectrum you must learn to make yourself a priority. Especially in your own lives.